Bumper stickers: I thought, therefore I was




There is this idea that a bumper sticker will inspire the right person, and this right person will inspire the world to change. Sometimes this right person is already on the far right and will cheer at whatever crude message there is about the president, guns, God and taxes.  Other times, the right person is on the far left and will cheer at bumper stickers that promote universal acceptance, except that we should obliterate those who are on the right, or in the middle… or in the not so far left for that reason.  From “I don’t call 911” to “don’t move wood, it bugs me” those bumper stickers achieve primarily one thing:  they get cars in auto body shops before their time.  Other than that, there are very few that are more than preaching to the choir with an air of self-righteousness.

One solution is to be the type of person who doesn’t need ostentatious labels in order to be deciphered. Or take the same Broadway approach and try to revitalize the ineffective bumper sticker industry by stating the mundane obvious that better matches our real lives.  A few suggestions:

  • I thought, therefore I was.
  • 1.31   2.62
  • THIS BUMPER STICKER will pay for my next bumper cover
  • Original®, but not unique
  • I stand for SOMETHING and sit while driving
  • The best thing about this bumper sticker is that I don’t have to see it while driving.
  • This won’t come off easy.
  • My candidate lost and I can’t peel this off my car
  • I voted the other way and it made a difference
  • My other car belongs to my spouse.
  • I’m better than my driving
  • READ THIS! now be sorry for listening to strangers.
  • I don’t have a personality crisis. My car does.
 

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Nicolo Machiavelli - The Prince

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Reason doesn't mean lack of passion,
and passion doesn't mean lack of reason.